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To me, it really doesn’t matter “After all the dating I’ve done, I definitely developed a #1 question for my dates,” says California native Jennifer, 34.“If they could go back and redo one thing over in life, what would it be? I hear about something that didn’t work out and then about how this person’s spent time trying to fix it — or just moved on and learned from it instead.What's worse is that you want to be in a relationship and experience all the pampering and lovey dovey looks. So why not take the initiative and try speed dating?It may be the fastest way to get you unstuck out of a rut in the dating game.That’s not two people forming a connection; rather, it’s more like trading mutual monologues with each other.You want to find out fast if your date has potential.

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I've personally read and heard a lot of this advice, but what I think is the most helpful when it comes to dating isn't giving and getting prescriptions -- it's asking and answering questions.

Here are some questions I think are good to ask yourself to make sure you're staying to true your identity, whether you're already in a dating relationship or interested in entering one (following six questions from 1) Who is the most important person in your life, and why? More precisely, how do you feel about yourself -- physically, emotionally, mentally, and spiritually?

3) What is the most important thing in the world to you?

So before your next date ends with you drowning in the banality of whatever you both had for lunch today (and without an inkling of what really makes the other person tick), consider these five quintessential queries (and hey, maybe they’ll help think of a few of your own, too): passionate about? “Sometimes, my date responds with another question (‘what do you mean? I reply by saying that I’m genuinely interested in whatever excites him most in life. Sometimes this question makes my dates uncomfortable, and they shift around in their seats and say that they don’t really know what to tell me.

Or they respond by telling me that they like ‘the normal stuff — work, hanging out with friends, etc.’ I look for the guy who brightens up at the question and starts to tell me all about whatever it is that he’s into right now.

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